The Free! Tissue Box Fic
by tastefulcucumber
Summary: Dan is sick and so is Phil. Wink wink.


The Free! Tissue Box Fic

Dan had a cold. Not just any cold, he had a man cold. You know you have the man cold when you complain every few seconds and wallow in your own misery.

It was June 2, 2015, and Dan had a live show to do. He blew his nose into a tissue from his Free! tissue box.

"Argh." He grunted, tossing the used tissue into the wastebasket.

"Dan?" A voice called from the other room. It was Phil. Phil was a silly man, almost childish. "Have you seen the tissue box?" The pale adult walked into the room. Dan answered his question with a short nod, and handed his flatmate the box.

"Thanks," He said, congested-ly. He blew his nose into the tissue, then threw the tissue at Dan.

"Ew!" Dan shouted, in an unnaturally high voice. Phil laughted in a high pitched voice, then walked over to the cringing Dan. Phil reached down and picked up the used tissue; he was smiling creeply.

"Don't you like my mucus, Daniel?" Phil asked him seductively, bringing the tissue closer to cowering Dan.

"No, get that thing away from me," Dan chuckled.

 _Oh, how cute_ , Phil thought, _he thinks were playing._ Phil laughed out loud: Dan startled. Dan started to open his mouth to say something, but before a word came out, Phil shoved the used tissue into Dan's gaping mouth.

"Mhh!" Dan's eyes grew wide, the mucus from Phil's tissue began running down Dan's chin.

"Yikes, that made a bit of a mess, didn't it?" Phil asked no one in particular. He grabbed a clean tissue from the Free! tissue box. He wiped the snot off of one of Dan's multiple chins. The mucus dripped over Phil's hand as he wiped the tissue around Dan's chin. Driblets of the substance landed on the floor.

Phil took the tissue he used to clean Dan with, and put it into his own mouth, tasting the mucus that had dripped out of Dan's mouth. As he sucked on the tissue, some of the mucus dripped out onto the floor.

Dan suddenly stood up, and tugged his own tissue out of his mouth - mortified. "What the hell? Your mad!" Dan's voice went up an octave higher than normal. Phil chuckled lowly.

"Only when I'm with you," Phil said flirtatiously, mouth full of tissue. He roughly pushed Dan back into his chair, and took his tissue out of his mouth. "It taste better wet," Phil commented, as he shoved his soggy tissue in Dan's face. He rubbed it around the outside of his face, slobbering it with a mixture of saliva and mucus.

"Open up," Phil taunted, as he grabbed hold of Dan's jaw, pulling it down. Dan opened his mouth slightly, letting Phil's hand in. Then, _chomp_! Dan shut his jaw tightly on Phil's hand. Blood rushed from Phil's fingers onto Dan's tongue.

"Oh, kinky." Phil struggled to say; his eyes flooded with tears. Dan removed the pressure from his jaw, and Phil slowly removed his broken mess of a hand from his mate's mouth.

"Haha!" Phil used his good hand to shove the tissue into Dan's mouth. He climbed onto of Dan before Dan could do anything about it, and shoved the tissue deeper into his throat. "You like to deep throat, don't you?" Phil asked, his voice was low and sweet. Dan gagged as Phil started to stroke the back of his throat with the used tissue.

Dan sank deeper into the chair. Although he was already uncomfortable, he became even more uncomfortable when he began to feel something poke his lap. All this kinky mucus shit was making Phil harden.

Snot began to fill up Dan's nostrils again. Liquid slowly oozed out of his nose. Phil noticed the oozing snot. He pulled the tissue out of Dan's throat, then tossed aside to the floor. Phil reached over to the Free! tissue box, and pulled out a fresh one. He brought the tissue up to Dan's face, and whispered in his ear, "Blow".

Dan obeyed, and blew his load (Of mucus) into the tissue. "I know you can blow harder than that," Phil commented. Dan blew again, this time, so hard he got chest pains. Phil nodded, "Yes… Yes… Good."

"I have- I have to do my live show soon." Dan creaked out of his vocal cords.

"Fuck…" Phil whispered, and then he slowly climbed off of Dan's lap. Dan got off the chair too, and he took a tissue out of the Free! tissue box. "Here," Dan started, "You needed this?"

"Yeah, thanks. I hope you get well soon." Phil said, taking the tissue from Dan, with his bleeding hand. Phil gave Dan a wink, and began to walk out of the bedroom. As he walked out, Dan heard him mutter, "Dan is not well. I bet I can change that tonight."

Opening up Safari, the suckiest browesr ever, Dan promptly logged into You Now, and waited a few minutes for the website to load. They really need to add some servers. Dan clicked broadcast, and typed the hashtag: #danisnotwell


End file.
